It's official, Christmas sucks

Originally published at: http://statelyplay.com/2016/12/21/its-official-christmas-sucks/

Back when I was a kid and mom would put on the same Christmas music we listened to every year, I took great offense at the line, “Mom and Dad can hardly wait for school to start again.” Hey, Bing, why don’t you go straight to hell you old child abusing asshole. Now that I have three kids of my own, I feel that Bing was actually a little soft. “Mom and Dad are only one more whine away from murder*,” would be a more appropriate lyric. Unfortunately it doesn’t rhyme, so we’re stuck with the original.

Anyway, today is my kids’ last day of school before we enter into two full weeks of familial bliss. It’s not even a full day, they get out of school at 11:30. Kids these days, amirite? What this means for you, dear reader, is that I’ll be up to my armpits in teenagers with one ungrateful first grader thrown into the mix. Getting content up on the site is going to be a hit or miss proposition from 11:30 going forward. I can’t promise I’ll have a lot of time to write, but I will try to get content up nonetheless. How is that possible? Read on.

While I cannot promise a lot of timely, up to the minute news reports [like that ever happened anyway -ed.] over the next week or two, we will be doing a sort of “year end” series of posts starting next Monday. Each day each of us here at SP Manor will be offering our top five digital games of 2016. We’re talking both mobile and PC here, so expect some eclectic content as the week rolls on. We’re going to do it in a very annoying fashion because, dammit, I have to fill up five day’s worth of posts. Monday will see our #5 games all the way up to our #1 titles on Friday. Click-baity? Yep.

That’s not all, though. I’ve also been contacting developers and we have a bunch of free keys to give away as well. Sort of like Christmas presents, but without all the godforsaken wrapping paper. We’ll be doling those out all week long, so pay attention to our Twitter feed and come visit us here, even though it’s likely no one will be physically manning the shop.

If all goes well–and I haven’t been indicted for first degree murder by January 3rd–we’ll pick up where we left off after the holidays. Everyone out there have a safe and enjoyable holiday and we’ll see you here if and when the children permit.

*This is a joke. There’s only about a 7.5% chance I’ll actually murder my children.

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Even if you don’t post a thing, the laugh I got from the open (and nearly making my wife spit her coffee when I read it aloud) was totally worth it.

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Two weeks? Lucky dog. Try three weeks. Oh, plus one day. They threw in one extra day.

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So, would this be a bad time to note that my kids’ last full day of school is Friday?

(ducks)

Ok, I’ll show myself out …

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And here I was dreading a week with my spawns… hats off and glasses up to @Neumannium and @TheDukester

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In the spirit of the holidays - Merry Christmas, Happy Hanukah, Blessed Kwanzaa, Festivus for the restivus - here’s a premium membership for a year of Board Game Arena. First come, first serve, please just pay it forward in your own way this holiday season. And also send me some game invites, I’m JS619 over there too.

Enjoy!

https://boardgamearena.com/giftcodes/giftcodes/giftcard.html?code=XAXRQG

(it downloads a PDF with the code which you then redeem on boardgamearena.com in case you’re like my parents technologically… which I doubt, but just in case)

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Don’t worry, parents, schools are all going to lock down and go remote again after break anyways…

I’m the meantime I bought Harry Potter Hogwarts Barrle to play through with my family, with more RPG-style games like Stuffed Fables and Moce & Mystics waiting on deck if I need them.

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I’m halfvoid on BGA as well.